Joy 101: Gratitude
Welcome to a brand new blog series, Joy 101, in which I’ll be delving into some of the key components of joy. I’ll be exploring what positive psychology tells us about each component, exploring the proven benefits, and of course, giving you some tips on how to invite each one into your life.
Today, we’re starting with gratitude. And the reason for that? Because research shows that there is no joy without gratitude. Being thankful is the number one predictor of living a joyful life. Studies show that when joyful people are interviewed, the one thing they have in common is that they practice gratitude regularly - they feel grateful for what they have and they habitually check in to show thanks.
So what are the benefits of gratitude? Here’s a whistle stop tour…
Benefits of gratitude:
Studies have shown that it boosts optimism! The more grateful we are, the better we expect life to be.
Gratitude is shown to make us kinder - we’re more likely to do nice things for other people if we feel grateful for what we’ve got. And we’re less likely to find ourselves stuck in the comparison trap - when we’re focusing on what’s good in our own lives, we experience a sense of abundance, rather than lack.
Feeling grateful increases our sense of human connectedness - and this in turn promotes better wellbeing.
There are some great physical benefits - gratitude helps to reduce the amount of cortisol in our bodies, minimising the impacts of stress, and has also been shown to reduce blood pressure and improve sleep.
Gratitude increases our sense of positive affect (psychological speak for experiencing positive emotions such as joy, contentment and pleasure).
Finally, people who are habitually grateful, those that make gratitude a regular habit, report being happier than those that don’t.
So, now we know all of the ways in which gratitude can contribute to a joyful life, how do we go about practicing it? Here are some tips to get you started…
Ways to practice gratitude:
Keep a gratitude journal
Sit at the end of the day, before bed, and check in on the things that have made you feel grateful that day. Top tip: be specific! The more specific you can be, the more power this practice will hold.
Do you feel grateful that you were up in time to catch the sunset, or that you’re physically healthy enough to get out on a lovely walk, or that your partner made you a lovely meal? Recalling specific moments like this can help you start to notice which parts of your day you enjoy the most, and also relive these happy memories!
Little reminder: the benefits come from the process of reflecting, not from being perfect - don’t beat yourself up if you miss a day here and there!
Write a heartfelt thank you to someone
It doesn’t matter who you say thank you to: it could be a friend, family member, colleague, or even someone who has inspired you. And it doesn’t matter how you thank them either - it could be an email, a text message or a handwritten note.
What matters is that you really harness the emotion of gratitude for this person, and add lots of details - what are you grateful to them for? What impact do they have on your life? How are they helping you in some way?
Completing this exercise will not only help you to practice gratitude, it will also boost your sense of good feeling and deepen the connection with the other person. Plus, it will likely bring them joy too - win win!
Consider what you’d miss about your life if everything was to change
If everything were to change, what would you miss? If you suddenly had to move, what would you miss from your current home? If you were let go from your job, what would you miss about the work you get to do? If someone you loved disappeared, what about them would you miss the most?
Asking yourself these questions can give you a fresh perspective and a renewed sense of gratitude for all of the joy you already have in your life. Once you’ve identified the things you’d miss the most, make an effort savour them in the here and now.
Reframe any negative thoughts
It’s very easy to fall into a pattern of feeling like the world is against us - one thing goes wrong, and suddenly we’re convinced we’re having a bad day or a bad week or a bad life.
One way to insure against this is to try and reframe our negative thoughts and look for an opportunity for gratitude. For example - say you get an expensive bill for a car repair. You can either chalk this up as yet another thing that has gone wrong, or you can feel grateful that you have a car to drive in the first place.
This isn’t about toxic positivity - it’s simply about changing the perspective so that you can feel grateful and joyful, instead of letting negativity swallow you up.
Zoom out
My final tip is to try and zoom out and change perspective where you can. This tool can really help when you’re feeling a little stuck or stagnant, and my favourite way to activate it is to think about what you have in your life that your grandparents wouldn’t have access to when they were your age.
Suddenly, things like the internet, the ability to travel, being able to build a career and being able to shower as regularly as you like feel like real benefits! The other reason why I love this activity is that it’s a reminder that things are always changing for the better, even if it doesn’t always feel that way.
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In summary - gratitude is an essential part of living a joyful life. There are so many ways you can practice gratitude, and it doesn’t really matter which tool you choose - what matters is that you try to build a gratitude habit that works for you, so that you can reap all of the rewards it will bring!