Some Thoughts On Turning 27
Tomorrow I will be turning 27. I will be officially entering my late twenties. And do you know what? I am actually kind of excited about it! I always thought that I would dread being in my late twenties. It just sounds so grown up and old, doesn't it? I feel like when I was 17, 27 was the age where I thought I would totally have my shit together. I envisaged that I'd have my dream, high flying career locked in and a beautiful grown up house (complete with gorgeous kitchen for all of those domestic goddess duties I'd be nailing). I imagined that I'd probably have lots of disposable income to spend on glamorous holidays to far flung beaches and that I'd maybe be ready to start thinking about having a kid or two.
And while 17 year old me was a touch on the naive side (I can barely look after me and Sam and nobody's about to make me marketing director anytime soon), I don't think I've done too badly for myself in my 27 years. Sure, I don't feel like the got it together grown up that I imagined I'd be by the time I entered my late twenties, but then, I'm not sure anyone really does, do they? My Nan always tells me that she still feels 18, and she's in her late seventies.
What I am feeling as I turn 27 though is strong. Not strong in a physical sense (because LOL, this girl hasn't done any exercise in a LONG time), but emotionally and mentally.
My early twenties were plagued with insecurities. I cared WAY too much about what everyone thought of me and spent far too long worrying about things that seem so insignificant to me now. I remember crying all the way home from work if someone was rude to me and spending countless nights feeling anxious that I'd chosen the wrong career path (I genuinely believed that age 22 was too old to change my mind!). Looking back now, I didn't know myself very well during those first few years out of uni.
And then the mid-twenties rolled along and with it came all of the endless comparison. I fell into the trap of thinking everyone's life seemed so much better on Facebook and worrying that because I wasn't getting a promotion/moving to New York/buying a gigantic house, I must be failing. I was constantly looking at what everyone else was doing rather than focussing on what made me happy. It was tiring.
Of course, I haven't spent the last 7 year being miserable, and there have been so many happy memories made in that time. But I feel like my late twenties is going to be even more fun.
Because now I know that it's useless to really care what anybody else thinks, because you will never please everyone. Now I know that whether I am a size 8 or a size 12 makes absolutely no difference to my happiness. Now I know that the world won't explode if I make a mistake, I will just learn something that could be useful in the future.
I have some pretty big dreams and goals for this little life of mine, and I feel like the confidence and assuredness that comes with being that little bit older is just what I need to put the plans into action. I no longer have the doubt or the insecurity that crippled me from doing anything too bold a couple of years ago. And MAN does that feel exciting.
So rather than crying into my cuppa that I can see my thirties on the horizon, I will be celebrating with a cocktail when the clock strikes midnight tonight. Because I know that the best really is yet to come.