Some Things I've Learnt To Accept About Myself
I have a confession to make: I'm a self-help junkie. I buy books that promise to help me improve my life, I take courses to teach myself new skills, and I'm always reading blog posts about the new habits I should be adopting in order to become a better human. But something I'm realising as I get older is that there are some parts of me that I will never change. And I'm beginning to think that actually, that's okay. We're not all supposed to be carbon copy humans who all prioritise the same things or live life the same way, and there's so much beauty in that.
We're all different, we're all unique, and there are some parts of our make up that will always stay the same, no matter how many practical guides or blog posts full of top tips that we read. I've made my peace with that, and have decided to embrace my quirks, rather than beat myself up about them.
Here are some things I've learnt to accept about myself...
I'm never going to be good at saving
I've tried every budget technique and financial planning style under the sun, but the truth is, I like being able to spend my money how I want to spend it. I love eating out a few times a week, I enjoy having an ASOS splurge every now and then, and you all know that I'm partial to a holiday or two.
For so many years I've beaten myself up about not saving a huge portion of my salary every month and felt insecure about the fact that I'm not the most financially savvy, but I've accepted that scrimping and saving isn't the way I want to live my life. I'm much happier working harder and earning more, rather than cutting back in order to afford the things I want.
I'm a workaholic
Which leads me nicely on to my next point - I'm a self confessed workaholic. In this day and age, when balance and mindfulness are celebrated above stress and late nights, it's not particularly cool to be chained to your laptop. But honestly? Nothing gives me a bigger buzz than being productive and creating work that I'm really proud of.
This is something I really noticed while we were away - once my brain had had the time it needed to relax and restore, I was itching to get working again. I genuinely love my full time job and a lot of the work I do on this blog feels more like a hobby, which can make it difficult to draw the lines between work and leisure sometimes. But do you know what? That's okay. My set up works for me, and that's all that matters.
I'm not very organised
I like to think I'm an organised person. I buy planners and diaries and start every year with the best intentions of keeping track of all of my plans and to do lists, but realistically, it never lasts past January. The truth is, no matter how hard I try, I end up back at square one with my messy desk and my pile of post it note reminders.
It's something that has made me feel really crap about myself in the past - with a new productivity or organisation hack popping up everyday, you can feel a little bit stupid when you have to ask your friend to remind you of the date of a party for the third time. But the truth is, my organised chaos works for me. I might not have the perfectly planned life, but my work always gets done on time, and I always remember the important stuff.
I will never again wear size 10 jeans
This is something I actually accepted a few years ago now, but I spent pretty much the first half of my twenties beating myself up about the label in my jeans. I tried fad diet after fad diet, signed up for spin classes and even ran two marathons, but still the elusive size 10 denim evaded me.
But do you know what? It doesn't matter. The joy of living my life fully, eating the food I wanted to eat and only doing exercise that makes me feel happy rather than punished far outweighs any momentary satisfaction that comes with being able to pick up a smaller size in Topshop. I am infinitely happier now I treat my body and mind with the love and respect they deserve, and I wish I had learnt to accept my thick thighs much earlier.
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Phew, just writing all that down has made me feel so much lighter. I can't tell you how good it feels to have given myself the permission to accept these parts of myself, and I would thoroughly recommend that you try making your own list. If you do, leave me a little comment to let me know what you're accepting about yourself!